The death of discourse

Outrage is the new national pastime.

We are simply never as happy as when we can be angry about some perceived injustice. It has completely overtaken honest debate in this country.

“You aren’t 100% on my side? Then you are a stupid liberal.”

“You aren’t as angry as I am about this? Well, then you are definitely either racist or sexist. Probably both.”

We don’t listen to each other. And we CERTAINLY don’t respect one another.

If you’re out marching, you’re too sensitive and you’re causing trouble. If you’re not marching, you’re part of the problem.

“Political correctness” has gone WAY beyond the pale. Just yesterday the internet was exploding about an Asian broadcaster being pulled off a University of Virginia football game because his name is Robert Lee. In the wake of the violence in Charlottesville, the decision was made two weeks ahead of the game to reassign Lee to a different game. It’s a wonderful example of all of our problems in one perfect, and completely unimportant package.

Let’s all agree here. It’s completely ridiculous for anyone to assign ill will to ESPN because this guy’s name happens to loosely match a Confederate general. Of course he shouldn’t have to change games. It’s also completely ridiculous that Lee would be in any danger. But you know what else is completely ridiculous?  Assuming that someone in this “victim for sport” culture won’t try to make hay out of it. Of COURSE someone will be upset. Of COURSE someone will take a photo with his name on the screen and turn it into a meme – finding a way to hurt people with something that should be nothing.

Even the way this story was discussed online tells you everything.

Some people lost their minds that “this guy can’t even do his job because of all the delicate flowers who might get their feelings hurt.” And the response?  “He’s being reassigned to a different game. It’s no big deal. Have a little perspective.”

But the problem is that none of us have perspective. Not anymore.

Why can’t we all use common sense? Why should ESPN have to say anything other than “Robert Lee is a professional broadcaster who has been assigned to this game. We condemn racism in all of its forms, and will proudly stamp our logo on his fine work in Charlottesville next month?” Why should ESPN have to say anything at all?

A friend of mine was talking about the horrible events in Virginia recently and how he had to explain it to his kids. You know what he said to them?  “There are some people in the world who think that white people are better than black people. Isn’t that crazy?”  His daughter’s response? “Really? That doesn’t even make sense.” I’m proud of that statement and the response. Don’t lend it any weight.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if it could be that easy?  It should be.

But our society won’t let it be. We have to continue these conversations - lend credence to arguments that would have seemed silly 20 years ago - to the point where it’s actually plausible that Robert Lee doing his job might offend someone… to the point where it isn’t ridiculous at all for him to change games.

It comes down mostly to WHO is sharing the story, not the story itself. If you’re on the left and see one of your Republican “friends” sharing this ESPN story then you feel obligated to jump in and defend “your side" - take on outrage that you don’t actually even feel yourself.  Just in case someone, somewhere MIGHT be offended, and the other guy will never be this enlightened. If you’re on the right and a “friend” you know to be a Democrat posted this story, you must rush to call it silly, and an overreaction. Make their perspective into a punch line. Because of the SOURCE, not because of the actual story.

Get off social media and talk to actual live people. You’ll see that we’re not that different. The truth is, nearly all of us hate racism, and wish that we could take the word “nearly” out of that sentence. The truth is, most people don’t actually want to see every citizen on the street carrying an assault rifle. The truth is, most people don’t actually want the federal government to support anyone who simply doesn’t care to get a job. These aren’t black-and-white issues and yet we feel obligated to treat them as absolutes – you’re with us or you’re against us. But who is representing the REAL us?

Sadly, most people don’t want to have an actual, thoughtful, measured conversation about any of it. The outrage is more fun. The anger is more energizing. A snarky comment about how stupid the “other side” is… or a flippant response to the same – that’s the currency of the day. Who got in the best zinger today?

I’m certainly not immune to this. You just read 750 or so words about how outraged I am by all of this outrage.

But I just feel like we’re shouting into the wind. All the time.

And what are we teaching our kids? That there are 2 polarized sides to everything. And anyone with a differing opinion should not be invited to the conversation – in fact, he should be mocked.

I’m reminded of an old quote. “I have never learned anything from someone who agreed with me.”

When will we learn?